Happy 6th Gotcha Day Ducky!!!

Oh, Ducky, you crazy little stinker! I can’t believe it’s been six years since the morning I saw you on GCAC’s urgent list and called “Daddy” at work. He said “go get her!” and our lives changed forever.

You were so cute! At a few days past seven months, you were still a puppy.

And you were a handful! All explosive energy. You drove Callie and Shadow crazy, even testing Callie’s seemingly unlimited patience at times. You wore me out with your antics. You’ve come a long way little girl!

When we said goodbye to Callie that morning, you kissed her head and jumped back up in Daddy’s lap. It was so cute. I almost wish I’d gotten a picture of it. And when we got home, you tried your best to cheer Daddy, Shadow and me up. And you were sweet to Shadow.

You’ve had your snarky moments when I’ve yelled at you for being ugly toward Shadow. And you’ve driven me to distraction with your incessant barking. BUT I wouldn’t give you up for the world. Neither would Daddy, or even Shadow.

Over the three years since Callie got her angel wings, you’ve grown into a sweet little “pup”. You finally seem to realize that Shadow IS your best doggie friend. And your older sister. You treat her now the way you treated Callie, with respect and even affection from time to time. And she even misses you on days when you’re at daycare.

I was in Florida, helping your Uncle Doug, on your 6th birthday so we’ll have a double celebration today. Maybe we’ll spend most of the day playing outside, weather permitting.

We love you to the ends of the universe and back, little girl! You are our little entertainer.

A Heartbreaking Anniversary 


Today – this morning actually – is the first anniversary of our precious Callie getting her angel wings.

I’m handling it better than I expected to. Yes, it hurts like hell. Yes, I miss my girl more every day. 

But – a BIG but – she’s not suffering any more. She’s a healthy, happy soul again free of her earthly form. I’m happy for my girl. 

I’m happy to have been her mom. Happy for all the wonderful memories she gave us. Happy that she helped me raise her and her younger sisters. 

Life has not been the same, will never be the same, without our beautiful girl. But we’ve adapted, adjusted, and done our best to move forward. 

I watch Shadow during the day. She prefers to sleep in Callie’s old favorite spots – in front of the bathtub, on the one dog bed of Callie’s that wasn’t ruined during her illness, on the kitchen floor next to my chair, and right outside the bathroom door while I’m taking a shower. And she loves to play fetch and keep-away, just as Callie did. Odd that she won’t play with Callie’s stuffed toys though. I know Callie wouldn’t mind – she was always good about sharing all the toys. 

And Ducky? In her own way I’m sure she misses Callie; but she’s been playing more with Shadow. And giving Shadow good-morning kisses when I first let her out of her crate. And she’s not snarking at Shadow as much any more. I think she has figured out that Shadow is truly her best doggie friend as well as her big sister. I’m pretty sure Callie is smiling down at them both. 

I still need to dab at my leaky eyes with a tissue at times. The realization that I can’t stroke her fur or kiss her good night, watch her snuggle with Shadow, or watch her teach Ducky to mind her manners still feels like a dagger in my heart. Yet the memories of such moments make me smile, with or without tears.

Hubby said last night that “she left us too soon”. I said that “even if she had lived to be 15 and a half, like Kissy, it would have been too soon.” But she hasn’t really left us. Her earthly form is gone, but her spirit is always here with us. She watches over us. And occasionally she lets me catch a glimpse of her spirit. Somehow she lets Shadow know, too, that she is still here. I sense it at times.